It’s Christmas – and as we’re feeling festive, we’ve come up with one present for each EFL Championship side as the big day approaches…
EFL Championship – Our Christmas Gift List
Leeds Utd would get… bubble wrap – they can’t wait to open that present they’ve been dreaming of for so long. However, it would make sense to hold on to that nice protective cushion first… just to make sure there’s no sign of breakage this time.
Stoke City would get… a digger toy – they’ve dug themselves into a right old hole but might now have the right driver in place to get things get back on track. Lots of heavy lifting still needed, mind.
Fulham would get… thermals – a stylish outfit on the surface but with a tendency to freeze when the going gets tough. Some extra protective layers are needed to kick on.
Luton Town would get… a wax candle – looked and smelt great before a ball was kicked, but quickly melting into a bit of mess as the season wears on.
West Brom would get… a red carpet – it already looks like they’ll be rolling one out next season with some high-profile names likely to be arriving en masse at the Hawthorns.
Nottingham Forest would get… champagne, on ice – life suddenly looks better at the County Ground with Sabri Lamouchi looking a shrewd appointment after years of misfires. However, there’s a sense it all might be a year too soon. Still, it could taste even better next year.
Sheffield Wednesday would get… a remote control – the Owls seem to be permanently stuck on pause at this level despite occasionally threatening to get their act together. Fans would probably take the fast forward option to see how off-the-field troubles might spike their play-off bid.
Wigan Athletic would get… a travel cushion – to provide some comfort on the road and make those long, uncomfortable and usually fruitless journeys a whole lot easier to stomach.
Charlton Athletic would get… a safety ladder – it looks like a long climb back towards mid-table safety with reality setting in for last season’s League One play-off winners. An extra magic sponge might also come in handy for the injury-hit Addicks.
Middlesbrough would get…a punchbag – Boro aren’t used to a relegation scrap at this level but need to learn how to box clever and show some streetfighting skills to avoid a bloody nose in 2020.
Bristol City would get… a trampoline – as you can always rely on them to provide plenty of ups and downs from one minute to the next.
They can sometimes leave you feeling slightly queasy, but you’ll have great fun in the process.
Swansea City would get… a cagoule – devastating in attack but their backline currently looks anything but watertight. Need to stop the leaking if they genuinely want to challenge.
Derby County would get… a selfie stick– it’ll come in useful for the media scrum turning up at Pride Park in January for their five minutes with Wayne Rooney.
Reading would get… a Whack-a-Mole game – they’ve suddenly got holes popping up all over the place in midfield. Need a little something extra to smash their way to safety during the winter months.
QPR would get… a padlock – to keep star man Eberechi Eze under lock and key. The 21-year-old could be the difference between a potential play-off chase or a nosedive towards the relegation bunfight.
Brentford would get… a time capsule – with only six months to go until the curtain finally comes down on 115 years of football at Griffin Park, it could be a nostalgic festive period in West London.
Preston North End would get… running shoes – Alex Neil’s side have the talent and guile to last the distance in the race for promotion – now they just need the staying power with big-spending rivals likely to strengthen in January. Can they avoid hitting the wall?
Birmingham City would get… slippers – as things are almost looking too cosy on St Andrews this season. Uncharacteristically, the Blues are comfortably gliding towards mid-table mediocrity under caretaker turned permanent boss Pep Clotet.
Hull City would get… a unicycle – even Tigers fans would admit Jarrod Bowen has had to do some heavy one-man pedalling to keep City comfortably away from the relegation places.
Blackburn Rovers would get… a invisibility cloak – you can occasionally be forgiven for forgetting they are still there, but they continue to creep up the table with hardly anyone noticing. That’s exactly the way the understated Tony Mowbray will want it to continue.
Cardiff City would get… vitamin tablets – to help finally clear them of the relegation hangover that has so far shown precious little sign of lifting. A stirring 3-3 draw fightback against Leeds might just have done the trick as Neil Harris looks to reboot the Bluebirds.
Millwall would get… a lump of coal – no-one likes them, but they won’t care now Gary Rowett has made them a nightmare to play again after they too often crumbled in games towards the end of Neil Harris’ tenure.
Huddersfield would get… a Netflix subscription – ‘Sunderland Til I Die’ should be required watching in West Yorkshire as the Terriers look to avoid repeating their trick. However, you suspect the Cowleys are a far better mid-series replacement than Chris Coleman.
Barnsley would get… a Great Escape DVD – new boss Gerhard Struber has inherited one hell of a job in South Yorkshire with the Tykes rooted to the bottom of the table – but he’s made a decent fist of things so far.
What gift would you get for each EFL Championship side?
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