I’m A Footballer, Get Me Out of Here: Which football stars should join Wrighty in the jungle?
The start of a new series of ‘I’m A Celebrity’ is just days away.
Reports suggest Arsenal legend Ian Wright looks set to follow in the footsteps of Harry Redknapp as he bids to be named this year’s King of the Jungle.
Which got us thinking…. what other football personalities would we like to see join him in this year’s line-up?
Here’s our fantasy XI…
I’m A Celebrity – Football’s Jungle XI
All great reality shows need a memorable villain of the piece, so ITV producers should take a trip up to Stockley Park to find a suitable candidate to spark friction in the camp.
Expect Ant and Dec to get their money’s worth as they get the VAR to check, double-check and triple-check whether that actress you’ve vaguely heard of from Hollyoaks actually got five or six stars for camp.
Would probably enter the jungle without having watched a single minute of the show – and still fully expect to leave three weeks later as series champion. And, despite winding up fellow camp-mates with his self-absorbed ways, you wouldn’t back against him pulling it off.
Likely to be the contestant who spends the most time preening himself in the campsite shower. Unlikely to indulge in campfire bitching, as he’d be far too busy talking about his favourite subject: Zlatan.
The Frenchman seems to be permanently waiting by the phone for a new project. With that tactic seemingly not bearing fruit, it’s about time ITV gave him something to do.
Wenger could try and emulate Harry Redknapp in the ‘unlikely career reinvention’ mould with a successful three-week stint in Oz. Expect him to chalk up plenty of early Bushtucker victories before fading badly and bowing out gracefully before he’s really ready to go.
The gruff no-nonsense Yorkshireman would spend 80% of each episode moaning about campsite conditions. However, secretly he’d be loving every single minute of the misery.
No food? No problem for Mick – as it would be one more thing to add to his list of gripes. Could probably also stop a snake stone dead with a fixed stare and a cutting comment.
If Mick’s going in, you might as well go full box office and throw in Roy mid-series to crank up the tension in camp. A man not prone to inane small talk, it’s hard to see the fiery Irishman lasting the full distance, but pound-for-pound he’d surely deliver the best value of the entire stories even if he bolts from camp after less than 48 hours.
We’d suggest he’s also possibly the only person alive who would fail to crack a hint of a smile at an Ant and Dec quip. For that alone, he’d be jungle gold-dust.
Every series needs a big personality, and Crouchy fits that bill in more ways than one. As the hardest working man in showbiz right now, one extra long-haul flight to Australia surely can’t do any harm. The 6ft 7in hitman might find the sleeping arrangements a bit testing with the pokey campsite beds not exactly kingsize.
There’s always one cheap-as-chips contestant booked who you’ve never heard of. Before you know it, they end up being the star turn. Like everybody else watching, you’d initially write him off as simply being there to make up the numbers. That’s before you tune in three weeks later to see him still toughing it out in the top five.
The beleaguered Hammers boss looks in desperate need of a break after a month to forget. Could a spell in Australia help him recharge his batteries?
Case for: the suave Chilean looks the Premier League manager least likely to have even contemplated tucking into a witchetty grub with his bare hands. Case against: could be a prime candidate for a mid-series flounce after a ninth consecutive day of rice and beans and no access to shampoo.
Like most Arsenal fans, we still can’t work out exactly what he would bring to the party.
However, the opportunity to see the Spaniard say ‘good evening’ to the nation in his own unique style when Ant and Dec walk in to camp looks too good to turn down.
The newly-anointed ‘Wagatha Christie’ has the sleuthing skills needed to crack the ‘Dingo Dollar Challenges’ to win treats for camp.
Plus, if she managed to survive just three eliminations, she’d already be one up on her great rival Rebekah Vardy, who finished 9th in 2017. Revenge is a dish best served cold, Coleen.
That one contestant they keep reminding you was massive in the Eighties.
Likely to be the butt of Ant and Dec’s jokes, but they’ve probably suffered long enough and you wouldn’t necessarily begrudge them a long overdue career comeback.
Image sources: PA Images
Which footballers would you like to see head into the jungle?
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